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Friday, March 04, 2005

His Parents Hate Me

Dear Diva Rebecca,

My Fiance has recently called off our engagement. To my understanding it was done over an argument that had nothing to do with us. It was between his parents and I. His parents hurt me a great deal. It was hard to get over it, but I knew I eventually would have. I just needed time. There were some very harsh words exchanged from me, but I was really hurt. Our arguing over his parents lasted for two weeks, and then he just called off the wedding out of the blue. He actually did not call the engagement off to my face he did it over the phone, and I have not seen him or really talked to him since. I have tried, but he seems like he is done.

Sincerely,

Parent Problems,
Morehead, Kentucky

Dear Parent Problems,

You should never ever get in such arguments with your significant other's family. I have no idea what happened and it could be their fault or yours. No matter what the case, you need to avoid family drama such as this.

Even if his family acted like participants on the Jerry Springer show you should turn the other cheek and act like the bigger person. Having screaming matches will never result in anything good. Even if his parents are the most atrocious people in the world, they are still his parents and they will always be a part of his life. To be honest, I can sympathize with your man. My mother is very ill. She has a terrible disease called Multiple Sclerosis. The disease has devastated her body and her mind. Slowly she has reverted back to the mind and personality of a 7 year old little girl. She throws tantrums, tells incredible lies and loves to cause problems. Yet she is still my mother. I could understand if my man would be upset with her, but if he ever raised his voice to her I think I would dump him, no matter how much I loved him. I understand that my situation is different than yours because your pseudo-in laws are probably not mentally impaired, but the feelings remain the same. If you disrespect the family, you disrespect the individual.

The only way you are going to salvage this relationship is to show him how much you want to remain with him. The only thing that will show him this is if you resolve your differences with his family. It is time to bite your lip and apologize. And the next time they piss you off, just walk away. learn how to hold your head up high and not have the need to retaliate verbally.

Sincerely,

Diva Rebecca

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